Dear Team Purple:
We really enjoyed our last LIVE Blogging experience. We thought you did too! In fact, expect to see more LIVE Blogging in the future. Please, love us through it. AND GO…………
Lula is online.
Sent at 7:58 PM on Tuesday
Lula: PURPLE, YO
i am here
Jane: And Olivia starts us out with some “pot stirring”
What on earth?
Lula: she should stir the pot–she’s the CHEF
Jane: 4 Teams???
Oh duh! That is right. I didn’t like the other way that could have gone re: stiring the pot. Thanks for your guidance always Lula
Ohh Hannah Banana…..Love you babe
Lula: I am nervous.
Jane: This must be so hard for them….I mean how do you pick away from your friends
Lula: wait–are we live blogging here–I just wanna be clear
Nervous like whoah…PS is that how you spell whoah?
Jane: Thanks! Listen I WILL BE WITH BOB for whatever!
I mean whatever
Lula: “Bob is Tongan.” No, BOB IS HOT.
Jane: What are they calling him Tongen? I need to look that one up and I was an Anthropology minor in College. Oh Irene, Lucky Duck
Lula: Tongan. Something about Hawaiians or something. We should Google that before we embarrass ourselves.
Lula: And JILLIAN is gonna beat the SHIT out of Rulon. Like we always knew she would.
Jane: Don’t say Shizz
Lula: Of course Olivia is with HER PEOPLE, aka Bob.
Jane: Olivia and Hannah make me teary…….what is new
Lula: ‘Member that time Olivia wrote me from the Ranch and was all, “Bob is our people?” He is so our people.
Jane: Thank goodness she gets Jillian! “I will be coming to you shortly”
Lula: And then Hannah prays on TV and we love her forever. She is COMING HOME, Lordy.
Jane: Oh Courtney. I love you. I wish you had Jill with Hannah
Lula: This musak is LAME.com <http://LAME.com>
Lula: COOOOOL. Jillian is down.
Jane: Hannah is with Rulon and I don’t know how I feel. I like that she is with Jill–ian but, not sure about the Rulon bizzness.
Lula: is Jen on Bret’s team? she is, right?
Jane: YES. It’s gonna get real
I love that tweet that Hannah just responded to us. Awesome. YEAHHH Daddy Jay or Arthur
Lula: I feel that Roulon is not Hannah’s people. I wrote back to Hannah just now. Win.
Jane: I may or may not agree with that….but we shall see. Oh I love Bob waying in.
I mean opinion wise. Hannah is the biggest angel. DO that right thing. Bless it!
Lula: DUH. It’s Jay.
also–how hard are we gonna cry when Jillian peaces out at the end of this season?
HARD, that’s how.
Jane: WORD Jillian gave it away on FB. Silly Jillian
Lula: But we love her. Even though she showed Jay on FB. With the lobster. OR crab. whatever that thing was.
Jane: Oh I love her. I hope I get to see Jillian in real life one day…ahem
CRUNCH! Where is Brody Jenner? (NOTE: I have a Brody Jenner problem, but I am #TEAMBROVIL)
Look at that girl GO!!
Lula: BWAHAHAHA. he is with Avril Lavigne.
Jane: He is! I am team #Brovil
Poor Moses, I feel for him. He is struggling but he is going to get a work out
The cheering is GREAT!
Lula: They are calling for him like that red sea is gonna part.
Jane: They ARE! And I would be crying if I was in that class right now…And I don’t cry
Also crying because we could see Olivia.
Lula: You will cry. At the end of all this, you will SOB YOUR HEAD OFF.
Jane: I wish I could go to CRUNCH this week. Also, just to see BOB. That spinning looks fab fun, but hard
Lula: I would spin my life away just to see him. yeah, I said it.
Jane: Look at how HOT Hannah is!!
Lula: Look, Jillian’s beach house.
Jane: BEACH house is NICE
Lula: SCARLETT O’HANNAH!
Jane: OK so Beks is calling me. STOP CALLING ME BEKS!
The Purple Team Show is on
Lula: She is crazy. Hannah is all ARE YOU ON CRACK?
I heart her.
Jane: I know CRACK. CRACK KILLS. They still have those ugly water bottles.
Lula: FUGLY water bottles.
Jane: Gosh I hope they have sunscreen on
Lula: At this point, even black would rock.
Jane: Pale gurls worry
Lula: And bless you–SUNSCREEN. Mama Jane.
Jane: LORD Have mercy! I told you CRACK KILLS. This is making me feel uncomfortable
Lula: CRACK KILLS.
Jane: He is throwing and pulling those girls around
Lula: and he’s all, “Jillian is riding me.” Lawsy, what a TWSS.
Jane: How awesome it is to run on MALIBU! NOW maybe she will actually see Brody Jenner!!
Again, NOTE – I may be obsessed with Brody Jenner, in a jokesy kind of way….but why not?
I love Jillian’s glasses
Lula: I’m obsessed with Jason Statham. And Alexander Skarsgard. WHY NOT?
Jane: I am kind of ignoring his heart to heart
Lula: ‘Member that time Olivia signed her email “Olivia Skarsgard Northman” and we died and loved her longtime?
Jane: It’s about Worthiness….good message. OH my gosh, I forgot about that OSN sign off
Lula: I am also ignoring it and walking down memory lane. Because Olivia + HotAlex > than Roulon’s pep talk.
Jane: You know indeed. Did they lose Hannah?
Lula: Hannah was all, “Peace out–gotta get my run on while y’all are being all Hallmark Gold Crown Store.”
Jane: Totally, she was like, I am gonna find me a hot malibu surfer guy. See ya’ll!
I wish the camera went with Hannah…..No BOB, Jill, Hannah, or Olivia
What do we do now?
Lula: I’m gonna drink some wine. To be honest.
Jane: I love that Courtney is happy to be outside
Lula: it’s antioxidants and good for your cholesterol, blood pressure, etc.
(NOTE – for some reason I ignore that Lula is getting her drink on)
Jane: Are they meditating? This is ummmmmmmmmmmmm interesting
Lula: IT IS GOD’s NATURE, LAME-O.
Sigh. Go hug a tree, Brett. #I’mMean
Jane: She is always so positive. Bless Courtney and she lost her mom last week!
Jen is so beautiful
Lula: Jen is looking AWESOME. All the girls this season are really beautiful.
Jane: And then there’s Justin
Lula: And I’m not gonna say, “They have pretty faces.” NO THEY ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL, ALL OVER.
OMS, “And then there’s Justin.” YEEEEEEE-HAW. Justin. Bless him.
Jane: They are, I agree. Esp their attitudes.
Lula: (I love you, Janet.) YOU MADE HIM CRY! You done made Justin cry, Jane Trigs.
Jane: I am special! I wonder how much his facial hair ways…weighs
Lula: MEAN. But…good point. Also, Brett has chin pubes. He needs to stop with that.
Jane: More realistic then mean.
Lula: NO. NO group hug.
Jane: Are we advertising now? No Jillian
Lula: Oh, dear. Commercial. ROULON is talking about being warm inside. I CANNOT SPEAK OF THIS.
Jane: Well at least she seemed natural. I ignored it.
Jane: Now, we have Cara………..
Oh but Papa Jay is back
We’ll wait for that
OK, watching Cara does not make me want to box, like the spinning with BOB makes me want to spin
Also BOB should always be in ALL CAPS
Like the rapper. But he’s BoB. So BOB can be BOB. He’s the original Robert.
Jane: This is boring and it’s boxing. I am sorry
Lula: The boxing is lame.
THIS IS NOT COMPELLING TELEVISION.
Jane: And it’s boxing which says something, doesn’t it?
Lula: I mean, don’t they know all we care about is Olivia and BOB and Hannah and Jillian?
And Sami Brady?
Dude, Cara. I cannot even grow to love her. Why is that?
Jane: What do the others do while one person is boxing? Each ice cream?
That was EAT not EACH
Lula: it’s also a good time to potty. be right back.
Sent at 8:40 PM on Tuesday
Jane: Can I just say that the NEWS lead in I just heard said, “A Surprise from the East Coast Rapist.” Ohhh Scary….don’t make that sound happy newscaster!
CHALLENGE TIME ya’ll
Lula: Don’t discuss east coast rapists–we just got @_Freya on our side of the country
Jane: Surprise, it’s Jay! (not the east coast rapist)
Oh that is right and we LOVE @_Freya
Jane: Yay Jay is RIGHT! He looks amazing.
Jay has immunity. Not sure why
Lula: Because Jay is awesome. I guess?
Jane: This is a strength thing I guess. I cannot figure out any of these challenges until they start happening
Lula: Me, either. It’s like watching Lost. WHO KNEW WHAT WAS GOING ON?
Jane: No one knows anything and they have to wear goggles!
Also, this may be boring again
Lula: I like Sami Brady’s coat. It’s very Sami Brady of her.
Jane: Do you have a FF button?
Lula: Austin needs a new HAIR DID.
I do have a FF button. But I’m watching live–so there’s nothing to FF.
Maybe we can play words with friends or something
Lula: Hahahahaha…I haven’t played WWF in months. Last game I had going was with Bekah–like, in October. I fail.
Jane: FIERCE BATTLE
Lula: FIER-US, says Justin.
Jane: I couldn’t spell well enough for WWF
Lula: A DOG FIGHT
Jane: “Better n that”. His “Coaching” would annoy me. But it looked like it worked. Go RED TEAM!
The Red TEAM IS AMAZING! Ohhh how wonderful! I LOVE THIS.
Courtney called Ben, Benny boy!
I love that
Lula: Awww like the parents. OK, this is how parents act–SELFLESSLY.
Jane: Oh dammit tears and it’s half way through the show. I love seeing Ben!
(Apparently we are watching very very intently and not typing)
Jane: Oh Ben!! Be strong for you. He is Amazing.
Lula: I am crying
Jane: I can tell
Lula: Ben has a pastor’s heart–he is so encouraging.
Jane: He is
I could hear him preaching that on a Sunday. So inspiring.
Look at how presc Moses’ daughter is
Moses stand tuff!
Lula: Moses’ fam is precious.
His wife is lovely.
Jane: Oh baby girl. Sooo cute.
These comments are amazing by the way
“I’m crying” “How precious”
We are so inciteful
Lula: here’s an amazing comment:
I HAVE TO PEE! Again
Jane: OH no……go gogo
Lula: OK, back.
will work on my insightfulness.
i just made that word up.
Jane: I add ness on lots of words, in case you didn’t know, which you do know
Lula: Lawsy–are you seeing this commercial for The Voice?
Xtina needs to be on The Biggest Loser.
Jane: My gym has Cybex
Lula: (I AM SO MEAN.)
Jane: I know…she needs to be on The BL
OK she doesn’t, I DO. SOrry I was mean
Switching up training is good
Lula: OK, I don’t even think Brett is cute. I mean–he ain’t no BOB.
Jane: I did the 1st week, but now he looks weathered
No one can be BOB
I am gonna go to my gym and ask to juggle ropes
Lula: “He looks weathered.” Girl…that is awesome.
JUGGLING ROPES IS THE WORLD’S GREATEST WORKOUT.
Jane: Ugly bottles
Bob and Jill train together STILL
That’s right. But Rulon gets the mad training
Lula: Bob & Jillian are lovers. But not in that way–you know what I mean?
Jane: They are common souls
I love them
Lula: They are old souls
Look at them. BFF!!!!!!
Jane: That’s what I meant…thanks
Kaylee looks like she is dancing a bit. But I am glad Kaylee had a moment
Lula: OK, Kaylee is cute and all. But I don’t care about her moment.
Jane: I care about her moment more than Justin’s
Lula: This is like watching a Lifetime Television for Women movie. A lot of fluff with no real substance.
Jane: We are MEAN….but NBC wants us not to like them
Jane: NBC is TOTALLY editing it this way. It’s not our fault.
Thank God Olivia & Hannah are the heroes.
Jane: I know, right
I love easter
Just thought I’d say that.
Lula: I love Easter. Because at church we sing, “Low, in the grave He lay…”
Jane: I like the “Old Rugged Cross”
(clearly we digress)
Lula: which I love…”Up from the grave He arose (He arose), with a mighty triumph o’er His foes…”
Jane: Listen to us…..Or read us
Lula: I also love The Old Rugged Cross. The lyrics to that are engraved on my Papaw’s tombstone.
Jane: Awwww that is sweet.
Lula: Also, LISTEN TO US. Also, Olivia & Ben would love this because WE ARE THEIR PEOPLE.
Don’t think Olivia hasn’t been clinging to the Old Rugged Cross during her time at the BL Ranch. GIrl, she has.
Jane: And with that, why are they all in wife beaters?
Lula: olivia looks really good in blue. but i miss the purple.
Jane: So does Sami apparently. Purple rules! So the gals have some braids on their heads. Notice?
JAY!! Yeah. We like that your name rhymes Hanhah Bear!
Wait I spelled that wrong…what eber
I am so excited about this weigh in that I am more mistyping (Yup, that is my excuse)
They are rocking that purple eye shadow aren’t they?
Cara don’t look at Jillian like that
Sami has mad jewelry on
MAD like BOB
Lula: I like Sami’s shoes.
Jane: And BL Blog also noticed their hair. Adorable
Lula: They are very DAYS-worthy.
Jane: I love Jen from BLog
Totally Days – worthy
Moses poor guy
Lula: Jen wants to meet us–did I tell you that?
yes, I saw that somewhere maybe in our in box
Lula: Also—she worked in my hometown–well, 15 min from my hometown, at the local newspaper.
Jane: for the twitter
She seems very nice
Lula: she’s covered football games at my alma mater. so of course i love me some Jen.
and irene amazes me.
GOOD FOR HER.
Jane: By the way, wear are the sports bras?
Lula: BEN AGAIN!
Jane: ohhh Ben!
Lula: Oh, Lordy. I will cry again.
Jane: SHE IS SOOOOOOO HOT
Lula: I like the tank tops better than those lame sports bras.
LOOK AT OLIVIA.
Jane: KNow what?
Lula: EFF THAT! WHY DO THEY ALWAYS GO TO COMMERCIAL ON OBIRD?
Jane: The wife beater tank tops are sooo much better than the sports bras.
You know who would approve of them?
Sayid And HOTALEX
Lula: OMS! SAYID! Our Iraqi Ninja!
Oh, man. Sayid would be down with some Obird in a wife beater.
Jane: And Hannah
5 lbs is amazing
YES YES YES!!!!!!!!
Jane: SOOOOOOO EXCITING
You go GURL
Lula: See, it took a pep talk from Ben and all that prayer from us.
Jane: No WALLS!
I love that they call her OB
Ben is the bestest at pep talking, me thinks I need to remember that for in the future
YES!! Jen did good too! She is so HOT
Lula: Jen is looking great!
Jane: I am so jealous. These ladies are amazing
Court’s make-up is adorable
Good JOB COURT! Justin Lost almost nothing Oh No
Lula: Is there some gameplay going on here. wtf?
Jane: Green team. OK the green team is throwing it. WHAT? DUMB
Lula: WHY DOES SHE KEEP SAYNG SHE”S READY TO GO HOME.
Jane: WHAH? So dumb
Did Kaylee throw it? What is all these low numbers? Not from our girls of course but the others
Why do people want to go home….I hate this. It is ridiculous
Lula: I don’t know.
Jane: What do you think is going on? This shizz is crazy. That man lost 7lbs and everyone else so little. What the?
Lula: I also miss Arthur at weigh ins.
Jane: Me too!
Lula: WHAT THE EFF? Something is lame.
Jane: Arthurs ups and downs and sincere face made you want to watch. Ahem….un like some lame people
Jane: We saw this 7lb loss a minute ago, why show it again? Kaylee had a plan and no one cares. LAME silly
Lula: Cara’s eyes just got so big. Brett calls the GAME PLAY.
Jane: GO SAMI! “This is not a prison.”
Lula: Sami Brady broke out her years of soap opera training.
Not home training. Soap opera training.
Jane: YES she did. THAT WAS AMAZING. Sami I love you forever
Game play is ridiculous. OH CRAP
Lula: THIS IS STRAIGHT UP CRAY CRAY.
Jane: NOT COURT!
Lula: OK, so this is nutty.
Jane: Justin should go
Girls cannot go not girls! THIS PISSES ME OFF.
Lula: GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS!
we sound like that Motley Crue song.
Jane: Ahhh Motley Crew
I mean Crue, oh you know I can’t spell. I wish we could have a song playing on our blog while reading it
I’ll add a video…Even if it seems silly
Lula: I love me some MOtley Crue. and that song–Girls, Girls, Girls–is on my badass playlist. It has motorcycles sampled in it. WHAT’S NOT TO LOVE?
Jane: Who doesn’t and only O and Hannah will know who we’re talking about….okay and Lisa
Is BOB gonna be on that cruise? Cause I’d go
Lula: Because we are each other’s people?
Jane: Oh no, I don’t want to cry.
Lula: Hey, let’s cruise the big, wide sea with BOB.
Jane: Please I hope this isn’t gonna make me be all broken down….oh Courtney is selfless
Bless Courtney. Oh Hannah, I love your comments you are right, this must be so hard to do
I love you Olivia you’re so insightful. This is crazy difficult for them you can see.
Lula: DUDE–HIS PEEPS ARE TURNING ON HIM. So much for all that “family” stuff.
Jane: No they are not they are honoring him I think
Lula: they are.
i get it. but they shoulda honored Arthur.
Jane: Yes they shoulda
This is not as emotional as I thought, I am happy they are following him and his wishes
Lula: this weight in is lame.
Jane: It is kind of. The mama went home last week and now the papa
Get along little doggie, Justin
I love the transformations part!
Lula: Yes–good call–both captains are now gone.
Jane: LULA he’s calling us out! GET UP or not
NBC wants us to like him now, don’t kow if I am foolled
He looks REAL GOOD
He has his own business now. Amazing
Lula: he better not be telling me to get out of bed and put down the wine.
Jane: ROPE JUGGLING
Lula: cause i am having my antioxidants now.
Jane: Aww Kody is adorable
Aww shucks, Family time. Take a SHOT!
Bless you and your Calling out Justin
Jane: WOW….they are videoed. YIKES!
Anyhow, until next week.
I am sighing out….Love you H and O
Lula: LOVE YOU.
Jane: Love you Lula
Lula: Glad there wasn’t too much dramz.
Lula: LOVE, PEACE, and NO CHICKEN GREASE.
Jane and Lula